Sunday, December 27, 2009

Word of the week series:2

This series of articles were taken from the newspaper website, http://www.themetrunuitimes.com/ It was formerly known as The Mata Nui Times. Following recent events, the newpaper has started to extend to other places, creating franchises such as The Bara Magna Times and so on. The website is widely regarded as the state-sponsored propaganda arm of Makuta Teridax. In fact, one fo the main Imperium newspapers, the 'Terra Times', went as far as to comment that "this newspaper and its contents are so heretical that even calling it so would be an insult to real heretics." Despite this, it is known that members of the Imperium, ranging from the Adeptus Astartes (or Space Marines) to Inquisition officials to even some High Lords of Terra (like the Adeptus Mechanicus Fabricator-General) are known to subscribe to this electronic newsletter due to some of its weekly specials. Recently however, due to some events during the Reign of Shadows, publication of articles were disrupted and suspended indefinitely for quite a while, and have only just resumed. Head editor of the newspaper, Tanma, has apologised, blaming it on "anarchists, arsonists and apostates" who are "out to destroy the Great Spirit, His Greatness Makuta Teridax, and therefore precipitate a drop in the shares of this respected newspaper company". The articles are regularly contributed by various contributors from all sources, irregardless of time, universe and even dimension.

As noted before, all the following words generally apply to the NJC Music Programme and Piano Ensemble, better known as the Scholotoire, although other people are quite welcome to try using them. They generally pertain to events, people and stuff of the Scholotoire.

Today's word of the week:
Thuzadian [adj. thoo-za-dee-ern] 3 Dictionary Results

-adjective

  1. NJC Music Programme Having an immense craving, desire, and hunger for any kind of music knowledge. When one is in the Scholotoire, one is expected to have a thirst for information on music that borders on the Thuzadian. This means being willing to listen to all the 20th century music in the library, sight-reading all the Bach inventions, and reading all the notes given to you by the General. - Unknown
  2. NJC Music Programme Being exceptionally knowledgeable on information and facts concerning anything about music, such as composition, history and aural perception. Few Pianifexes or even Primoris Liches can match the mind of General Kiakas. His knowledge is downright Thuzadian. He seems to know every musical work and composer, especially the 20th and 21th century ones which many music students are ignorant of, such as Ligeti, Boulez and Stockhausen. - High Pianifex Gayle
  3. NJC Music Programme, Archaic Having an unusual and often obsessive interest in music knowledge that is forbidden or otherwise anathema to Scholotoire consciousness. I would regard an obsession with pop-music as particularly Thuzadian. Beware that you are not ensnared by such wiles of the Heresy. - Then Primoris Lich, Saint Andrew

Source:
Warcraft: Reign of Chaos, Frozen Throne, and World of Warcraft. Derived from the eponymous archmage-turned-necromancer-turned-lich in the story, Kel'Thuzad. Already very knowledgeable, powerful and respected in life, he pledged his soul and service to one of the main antagonists in Warcraft, the Lich King, in return gaining more knowledge and power (hence the meanings behind the words). Kel’Thuzad has an exemplary service record to his new employer, helping to develop and spearhead the Undead Scourge’s invasion of Lordaeron. His CIP record is laudable as well, having helped to develop a school (the Scholomance) as well as providing a spiritual and theological counseling service for human beings. Currently, he resides in the floating necropolis of Naxxramas, where he helps to defend his employer’s domains against the invading armies of the Horde and Alliance. Possessing a doctorate in Necromancy, as well as an honorary professorship from the Yong Siew Toh Conservatory of Music in Piano Performance and Composition, Kel’Thuzad spends his free time playing and conducting in several chamber orchestras.

Contributor:
Ras Frostwhisper, Overseer of the Scholomance

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Happy birthday Shostakovich!

Well, his birthday was yesterday, really.

And happy birthday Gershwin!

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Advertisement: Upcoming NJC Music Programme Tannhauser Production

This was found on the website of the newspaper, The Metru Nui Times, at http://www.themetrunuitimes.com/. It was formerly known as the Mata Nui Times by readers and observers. The website has a section where upcoming art and music events are displayed for the public's knowledge. In playing the widely acknowledeged role of being Makuta Teridax's propaganda arm, it constantly touts these advertisements as 'benefits sent by the Beloved Leader for the Greater Good'.

As follows:


'TANNHAUSER PRODUCTION
NOW ON DVD!

Opera lovers can now purchase their own copy of the NJC Music Programme's production of Wagner's opera, Tannhauser, at any good music store in Metru Nui! Widely acclaimed by music critics universe-wide, this production is bound to amaze and delight at every turn. Its contains various post-modernistic techniques to convey the Programme's own interpretation of the Great Wagnerian Classic. Conducted by the acclaimed General Kiakas, this opera production is a must-see for all opera lovers!

Tannhauser:

Roles of the Opera:

(Heinrich) Tannhauser
A musician and a member of the Scholotoire: Dominic


Elisabeth
The Pianifex's niece:
Shou Jin


Wolfram von Eschenbach
A musician, Tannhauser's best mate and a member of the Scholotoire: Shou Yu


Herrmann
Pianifex of the Scholotoire and Elisabeth's uncle: Andrew


Walther von der Vogelweide
A musician and member of the Scholotoire: Chester


Biterolf
A musician and member of the Scholotoire: Liang Jie


A young shepherd girl: Julienne


Pilgrims
Penitents hoping to seek redemption:

Kang Ming
Dennis
Wei Ye
Ying Xuan
Josephine
Yi Jing

Ladies of the Scholotoire
Talented musicians:
Xiang Yi
Gayle
Erin
Liu Min
Lichen
Audrey
Deirdre
Kelly
And:
Rachel, Christina and Irene as guest stars.

Three Charites:
Audrina
Esther
Vivian

With Cleon Tan as Venus,
Master of the Venusberg as well as a Music Professor.

Production Director: Phoon Yu

Played by the Metru Nui Philharmonic conducted by General Kiakas


Sypnosis of the Opera (in 3 Acts):

ACT 1:
Place: The Venusberg

Following the solo ballet, Tannhauser, a willing captive of Venus, realizes that despite the pleasures that Venus can offer, he is already tired of these and wishes to return to the mortal world. Venus is greatly displeased despite his praise and passionate pleas for release and condemns him for his fickle-mindedness, saying that one day; he will ask to return to the Venusberg. He tries to charm him again, but Tannhauser invokes the name of General Kiakas as his ‘salvation’. These words release him from Venus’s hold and send him back to the real world, where he lies motionless in the mud. It is springtime; a shepherd girl sings an ode to Spring and a group of pilgrims passes him by. He is eventually found by the Pianifex and his companions, Wolfram, Walther and Biterolf. The group tries to persuade Tannhauser to go back with them, but he refuses. Wolfram then points out that his love song (previously he had fled because he was bested in a singing competition) has won him the heart of Elisabeth, the Pianifex’s niece, and Tannhauser then joyfully agrees to go back with them.

ACT 2:
Place: The Music Room of the Scholotoire.

Elisabeth has been living retired from the world since Tannhauser’s departure. When she hears that he is back, she joyfully agrees to be present at a contest of song. Wolfram then leads Tannhauser to her, where they have a little reunion. The guests then arrive for the singing competition, received by the Pianifex and Elisabeth. Wolfram starts first, saying that love is like a pure stream, which should never be troubled. Tannhauser hotly replies that love should be in the pleasure of the senses, despite everyone supporting Wolfram. The other singers sing along the lines of Wolfram, and Tannhauser replies separately to them, before, in a fit of passion, he sings a love song praising Venus and says the infamous line, that if anyone is to discover true love, he is to “make haste, make haste, to the Venusberg!”

The congregation reacts in horror, the Ladies leave and the remaining members set upon Tannhauser, with Biterolf being the biggest denouncer, until Elisabeth defends Tannhauser and says that he should be given a shot at redemption. The others are doubtful, but since Tannhauser has expressed his penitence, the Pianifex agrees, expelling Tannhauser on pain of death from the Scholotoire grounds until the President of the Student Council has granted him salvation.

ACT 3:
Place: Elysium Fields

An autumn scene. Elisabeth has been praying for Tannhauser that he might seek redemption, with Wolfram observing. The Pilgrims return redeemed, and Elisabeth searches for Tannhauser among them, but in vain. She then decides to return back to the Scholotoire. Wolfram stays on in the field, before spotting another pilgrim in torn garments. When he goes to investigate, he is shocked to discover that it is Tannhauser, and reminds the latter that he is not to be near the Scholotoire on pain of death. He then asks Tannhauser about his story, who first refuses to reply, then decides to tell it. It turns out that Tannhauser, in his penitence, decides to carry out extra acts of penance, more so than a regular pilgrim. When he reaches Rome, he meets the President, hoping to get forgiveness. However, the President lambasts him and says that, “For indulging in the pleasures of the Venusberg, you shall be perpetually damned in the fires of hell” as surely as the President’s staff “cannot sprout leaves.” Tannhauser curses the forgiven pilgrims and, in despair, calls on Venus to take him back. Wolfram quails in terror, and Venus appears, to Tannhauser’s delight. He agrees to forgive Tannhauser for his infidelity and welcomes him back. Wolfram then notices a bier bearing Elisabeth’s corpse and calls out the name of Elisabeth, permanently breaking Venus’s hold over Tannhauser. Tannhauser rushes to the corpse, collapsing with the words, “Holy Elisabeth, pray for me.” A young pilgrim enters ahead of his fellows and says that the President’s staff has sprouted leaves, a sign that Tannhauser has finally gotten divine redemption.

Praise for Tannhauser by the NJC Music Programme:
"Good Stuff!"--Makuta Teridax

"All for praise!"--The Metru Nui Times

"A great production. Surely no opera lover can miss this as much as no one can miss the Great Journey."--The High Charity Times

"One that rivals the Greater Good in distinction."--The T'au Chronicle

"Bring it on!"--The Witch King of Angmar, Minas Morgul (Minas Ithil)

"One of the greatest production of our times"--Gresh, Bara Magna

"Not to be missed. If geniuses that small can produce such a masterpiece, it behooves us to 'make haste, make haste' to watch this concert to pay tribute!"--Thel'Vadam (The Arbiter), Sangheilios

"Just as knowledge begets curiosity and vice versa, so I feel that in watching this, we will not only learn more from so young ones, but also thirst for more such productions."--Hieronymous Tzeentch, Eye of Terror

Next up: Elektra by the people who brought you Tannhauser! The NJC Music Programme? Nah! It is the Metru Nui Dance and Drama Company!

Friday, May 22, 2009

Word of the week series:1

This series of articles were taken from the newspaper website, http://www.themetrunuitimes.com/ It was formerly known as The Mata Nui Times. Following recent events, the newpaper has started to extend to other places, creating franchises such as The Bara Magna Times and so on. The website is widely regarded as the state-sponsored propaganda arm of Makuta Teridax. Famous Istar political commentator Gandalf the White, from the Undying Lands, Middle Earth, stated that "This newspaper has become something like an extra appendage (and vulgar at that) of the insidious new political establishment." However, he also noted that "The newpaper does provide some of the most witty things that I have ever seen. Not even the Valar can beat that!" These articles are regularly provided by contributors from all sources.

This new series is aimed at adding to the English vocabulary from all kinds of different and disparate sources for the benefit of the Music Programme. Did you know that if a certain word is repeated often, it can become part of the English vocabulary as it sinks into public consciousness?

All these following words generally apply to the NJC Music Programme and Piano Ensemble, although other people are quite wellcome to try using them. They generally pertain to events, people and stuff of the Music Programme.

Today's word of the week:
Skakdi [n. ss-kark-dee] 2 Dictionary Results

-noun, plural (same)
  1. NJC Music Programme A (derogatory) term applied to a person who lacks classical concert etiquette, be it talking too much during concerts, or clapping in between movement etc. Among the crowd in last night's concert were some Skakdi who obviously could not tell movements apart, clapping at every chance they got.
  2. NJC Music Programme A (derogatory) term applied to a person who shows little appreciation of classical music (inclusive of post 1945 avant garde). Why do you think we have so little people [in the Music Programme]? Its all the Skakdi out there who do not appreciate classical stuff!--General Kiakas

Source:
Bionicle 1st series, 2006. Derived from the vicious group of savages who lived on the island of Zakaz, watched over by first Makuta Spiriah, then Makuta Krika. Physiologically speaking, these creatures were tall, with organic spines on their backs and had permanent bestial smiles on their faces. The Skakdi are regarded by most citizens in Metru Nui as no more than barbarians. It is somewhat true given that the citizens of Zakaz are generally at war with each other due to the genetic engineering conducted on them by the Spiriah, which altered their physiology and psychology. The whole island of Zakaz is in chaos and anarchy due to the ongoing civil war. Despite being regarded as barbarians, the Skakdi do possess a rather high intelligence, which generally goes towards avarice and cruelty in their actions. Currently, the Skakdi do not have a delegation in the Matoran convention and rely on their Makuta delegation.

Contributor:
Toa Helryx

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Sunday, March 8, 2009

did you know

that they actually DO have music books at Jurong East Regional Lib? I went there for the first time yesterday, and they do have quite a fair bit of stuff. Though we probably have half the collection, and that some of them are really REALLY old (think pub. in 80s).

But it's a nice place. Big. Surrounded by books. And there's this very cool book on opera, which illustrates the synopsis of the popular operas! (It's actually for kids, I think, but who cares)

Now, to find time to actually READ. Ham.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

The Inauguration

This was found in the newspaper website, http://www.themetrunuitimes.com/ on 12th of February. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this website, it was formerly known as The Mata Nui Times. It has since, following recent events, become the state-sponsored propaganda arm of Makuta Teridax. This was drawn from a recent reporting done at a recent conference by Tanma.

As follows:

'MAKUTA TERIDAX WELCOMES NEW JH1S, JH3S AND SH1S INTO THE NJC MUSIC FAMILY'

Today, at an inaugural press conference, our Dear Leader proceeded to welcome the arrival of new music students into the midst of the NJCians. On behalf of 'the citizens of the Makutaverse', as he insists on calling his rightful domain, he congralutated the Hunter on receiving such good music geniuses, and encouraged the students to greater heights and not to give up. He then proceeded to dedicate the opening address to giving advice, encouraging and supporting the new JH1s, JH3s, and SH1s.

As follows:

"NJC friends, I come to you in the wake of recent events to issue a clarion call to reason. Let no music student deny the perils of our time. While we battle one another, divided by the petty strife of irrational antagonism, the tide of a greater conflict is turning against us, threatening to destroy all that we have accomplished. It is time for you as friends and comrades in music to set aside our differences and unite! The tides of an unwinnable examination are upon you'all, and you must seek refuge on higher ground, or be swept away by the Tides of Darkness.

The old music syllabus of neoclassicism is no more. Whatever semblance of concordance, familiarity and protection it once provided is a phantom, a memory. With a new topic of Nationalism on the onslaught for the A-Levels, who will you turn to for protection? The devastation that will be wrought by these frequent changes of syllabus will be self-evident. You may quake under Copland, or shiver under Bartok. Students shall struggle with Gamelan and Indian music. Unprecedented, even unthinkable, and unimaginable though they may be, these are the signs of our time. They are the prophetic oracles of that which is to come. Soon, you would be swept aside in the ensuing flood of despair in the chaos

The time has come, music students, to rally to a new banner. One that is aligned to your common venerable cause. In duty lies purpose, unity lies strength, and destiny lies hope! Already, many dissident music enthusiasts have joined your great Alliance. Out of the many, you shall forge an indivisible and unbreakable whole, bounded together by your love of music and comradeship! And from the Coliseum, I shall step forth to watch over you!

From this day forward, let no music student clash with any other like-minded comrade. Let no student conspire against this new egression. And let no student consort with your nemesis. And to all the enemies of NJC Music Programme, seek not to bar their way, for they shall win through, no matter the cost!

We of Metru Nui have always been behind you. Despite the change in leadership, I shall uphold the charge of my predecessors and become the stalwart defender of your grand cause! Fare you well, young geniuses! And remember, treasure the three virtues of Unity, Duty and Destiny. They shall be your sole compass in this consuming tides of evil.

And now regarding the economic recession in Metru Nui..."

Wise advice indeed. The Great One has indeed emphasised the importance for the group to stay unified regardless of their differences. Temporal differences must be swept aside to support each other to maintain their interest in music.'

...

'Later, when questioned, opposition members also agreed with the Grand Hierarch's words, despite their obvious distastes for our Leader. Opposition leader Turaga Dume (pronounced Du-ma) stated that music students, as "young geniuses", must "step forth and receive their talents as heirlooms, accepting it and nurturing it to bear fruit". Most other citizens of Metru Nui were also in concord with our Dear Leader.

And with that, this correspondent wishes the students good luck in their future music endeavors.'

Sunday, January 11, 2009

food for the wabbits

As a stress reliever, for those who are doing their last minute rushing of hols hw :)

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Q: What do you call a person who plays the viola?
A: A violator.

Q: What is the difference between the first and last desk of a violin section?
A: Half a measure.

Q: What is the best recording of the Walton viola concerto?
A: Music Minus One.

Q: Why can’t you hear a piccolo on a digital recording?
A: Recording technology has reached such an advanced level of development that all extraneous noise is eliminated.

Q: What do a saxophone and a lawsuit have in common?
A: Everyone is happy when the case is closed.

Did you hear about the classical pianist who was not a good speller? When she went out to buy something she left a sign on her door that said: “Out Chopin. Be Bach in a minuet”

Q: Why did they arrest the musician?
A: He got into treble.

Q: What is musical and handy in the supermarket.
A: A Chopin Lizst.

Q: Why did the music student have a piano in the bathroom?
A: Because he was practicing Handel’s Water Music.

Two violinists make a pact that whoever dies first, he will contact the other and tell him what life in Heaven is like. Poor Max has a heart attack and dies. He manages to make contact with Abe the next day. Abe says, “I can’t believe this worked! So what is it like in Heaven?” Max replies, “Well, it’s great, but I’ve got good news, and I’ve got bad news. The good news is that there’s a fantastic orchestra up here, and in fact, we re playing “Sheherezade,” your favorite piece, tomorrow night!” Abe says, “So What’s the bad news?” Max replies, “Well, you're booked to play the solo!”

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Efficiency

From: Efficiency & Ticket, Ltd., Management Consultants
To: Chairman, The London Symphony Orchestra
Re: Schubert's Symphony No. 8 in B minor.

After attending a rehearsal of this work we make the following observations and recommendations:

1. We note that the twelve first violins were playing identical notes, as were the second violins. Three violins in each section, suitably amplified, would seem to us to be adequate.

2. Much unnecessary labour is involved in the number of demisemiquavers in this work; we suggest that many of these could be rounded up to the nearest semiquaver thus saving practice time for the individual player and rehearsal time for the entire ensemble. The simplification would also permit more use of trainee and less-skilled players with only marginal loss of precision.

3. We could find no productivity value in string passages being repeated by the horns; all tutti repeats could also be eliminated without any reduction of efficiency.

4. In so labour-intensive an undertaking as a symphony, we regard the long oboe tacet passages to be extremely wasteful. What notes this instrument is called upon to play could, subject to a satisfactory demarcation conference with the Musician's, be shared out equitably amongst the other instruments.

Conclusion: if the above recommendations are implemented the piece under condsideration could be played through in less than half an hour with concomitant savings in overtime, lighting and heating, wear and tear on the instruments and hall rental fees. Also, had the composer been aware of modern cost-effective procedures he might well have finished this work.

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Glossary of music terms

Accent: An unusual manner of pronunciation, e.g. "Y'all sang that real good!"

Accidentals: Wrong notes

Ad Libitum: A premiere.

Agitato: A string player's state of mind when a peg slips in the middle of a piece.

Agnus dei: A famous female church composer.

Allegro: Leg fertilizer.

Altered Chord: A sonority that has been spayed.

Atonality: Disease that many modern composers suffer from. The most prominent symptom is the patient's lacking ability to make decisions.

Augmented fifth: A 36-ounce bottle.

Bar Line: A gathering of people, usually among which may be found a musician or two.

Beat: What music students to do each other with their musical instruments. The down beat is performed on the top of the head, while the up beat is struck under the chin.

Bravo: Literally, "How bold!" or "What nerve!" This is a spontaneous expression of appreciation on the part of the concertgoer after a particularly trying performance.

Breve: The way a sustained note sounds when a violinist runs out of bow.

Broken consort: When somebody in the ensemble has to leave and go to the restroom.

Cadence: When everybody hopes you're going to stop, but you don't.

Cadenza: The heroine in Monteverdi's opera "Frottola".

Cantus firmus: The part you get when you can only play four notes.

Chansons de geste: Dirty songs.

Chord: Usually spelled with an "s" on the end, means a particular type of pants, e.g. "He wears chords."

Chromatic Scale: An instrument for weighing that indicates half-pounds.

Clausula: Mrs. Santa.

Coloratura Soprano: A singer who has great trouble finding the proper note, but who has a wild time hunting for it.

Compound Meter: A place to park your car that requires two dimes.

Con Brio: Done with scouring pads and washboards.

Conductor: A musician who is adept at following many people at the same time.

Conductus: The process of getting Vire into the cloister.

Counterpoint: A favorite device of many Baroque composers, all of whom are dead, though no direct connection between these two facts has been established. Still taught in many schools, as a form of punishment.

Countertenor: A singing waiter.

Crescendo: A reminder to the performer that he has been playing too loudly.

Crotchet: 1) A tritone with a bent prong. 2) It's like knitting, but it's faster. 3) An unpleasant illness that occurs after the Lai, if prolation is not used.

Cut time: When you're going twice as fast as everybody else in the ensemble.

Da capo al fine: I like your hat!

Detache: An indication that the trombones are to play with the slides removed.

Di lasso: Popular with Italian cowboys.

Discord: Not to be confused with Datcord.

Drone: The sound of a single monk during an attack of Crotchet.

Ductia: 1) A lot of mallards. 2) Vire's organum.

Duration: Can be used to describe how long a music teacher can exercise self-control.

Embouchre: The way you look when you've been playing the Krummhorn.

English horn: A woodwind that got its name because it's neither English nor a horn. Not to be confused with French horn, which is German.

Espressivo: Close eyes and play with a wide vibrato.

Estampie: What they put on letters in Quebec

Fermata: A brand of girdle made especially for opera singers.

Fermented fifth: What the percussion players keep behind the tympani, which resolves to a 'distilled fifth', which is what the conductor uses backstage.

Fine: That was great!

Flute: A sophisticated pea shooter with a range of up to 500 yards, blown transversely to confuse the enemy.

Garglefinklein: A tiny recorder played by neums.

Glissando: The musical equivalent of slipping on a banana peel. Also, a technique adopted by string players for difficult runs.

Gregorian chant: A way of singing in unison, invented by monks to hide snoring.

Half Step: The pace used by a cellist when carrying his instrument.

Harmonic Minor: A good music student.

Harmony: A corn-like food eaten by people with accents (see above for definition of accent).

Hemiola: A hereditary blood disease caused by chromatics.

Heroic Tenor: A singer who gets by on sheer nerve and tight clothing.

Hocket: The thing that fits into a crochet to produce a rackett.

Interval: How long it takes you to find the right note. There are three kinds: Major Interval: a long time; Minor Interval: a few bars; Inverted Interval: when you have to back one bar and try again.

Intonation: Singing through one's nose. Considered highly desirable in the Middle Ages

Isorhythm: The individual process of relief when Vire is out of town.

Isorhythmic motet: When half of the ensemble got a different photocopy than the other half

Lamentoso: With handkerchiefs.

Lasso: The 6th and 5th steps of a descending scale.

Lauda: The difference between shawms and krummhorns

Longa: The time between visits with Vire.

Major Triad: The name of the head of the Music Department. (Minor Triad: the name of the wife of the head of the Music Department.)

Mean-Tone Temperament: One's state of mind when everybody's trying to tune at the same time.

Messiah: An oratorio by Handel performed every Christmas by choirs that believe they are good enough, in cooperation with musicians who need the money.

Metronome: A dwarf who lives in the city.

Minim: The time you spend with Vire when there is a long line. Breve: The time you spend when the line is short.

Minnesinger: A boy soprano or Mickey's girlfriend in the opera.

Modulation: "Nothing is bad in modulation."

Motet: Where you meet Vire if the cloister is guraded.

Musica ficta: When you lose your place and have to bluff till you find it again. Also known as 'faking'.

Neums: Renaissance midgets

Opus: A penguin in Kansas.

Orchestral suites: Naughty women who follow touring orchestras.

Ordo: The hero in Tolkien's "Lord of the Rings".

Pause: A short period in an individual voice in which there should be relative quiet. Useful when turning to the next page in the score, breathing, emptying the horn of salvia, coughing, etc. Is rarely heard in baroque music. Today, the minimum requirements for pauses in individual pieces are those of the Musicians' Union (usually one per bar, or 15 minutes per hour).

Pneumatic melisma: A bronchial disorder caused by hockets.

Quaver: Beginning viol class.

Rackett: Capped reeds class.

Recitative: A disease that Monteverdi had.

Rhythmic drone: The sound of many monks suffering with Crotchet.

Ritornello: An opera by Verdi.

Rota: An early Italian method of teaching music without score or parts.

Rubato: Expression used to describe irregular behaviour in a performer with sensations of angst in the mating period. Especially common amongst tenors.

Score: A pile of all the individual orchestral voices, transposed to C so that nobody else can understand anything. This is what conductors follow when they conduct, and it's assumed that they have studied it carefully. Very few conductors can read a score.

Solesme: The state of mind after a rough case of Crotchet.

Supertonic: Schweppes.

Tempo: This is where a headache begins.

Tempus imperfectum: Vire had to leave early.

Tempus perfectum: A good time was had by all.

Transposition: An advanced recorder technique where you change from alto to soprano fingering (or vice-versa) in the middle of a piece.

Trill: The musical equivalent of an epileptic seizure.

Trope: A malevolent Neum.

Trotto: An early Italian form of Montezuma's Revenge.

Tutti: A lot of sackbuts.

Vibrato: The singer's equivalent of an epileptic seizure.

Vibrato: Used by singers to hide the fact that they are on the wrong pitch.

Virelai: A local woman known for her expertise in the Lai.

Virtuoso: A musician with very high morals.

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Last but not least (i think py will kill me for this):

Q: Why did Beethoven kill his chicken?
A: It kept saying "Bach, Bach, Bach..."





happi laughing =]

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Path of Ascension

From an article published on the newspaper website, http://www.themetrunuitimes.com/. For those of you who are unfamiliar with this website, it was formerly entitled ‘The Mata Nui Times’. Due to recent events, the current newspaper has become the state-sponsored propaganda arm of Makuta Teridax. These are extracts written by senior correspondent Takanuva.

As follows:

‘TURAGA DUME WELCOMES NEW YEAR; ENCOURAGES NJC MUSIC PROGRAMME CURRENT J2S.

Today, from the Coliseum, Turaga Dume welcomed the New Year in his traditional opening speech to the Matoran Convention. While asking for all Matoran to take heart in the beginning of a new year, he also decided to draw attention to certain issues on which he would like to comment on. Firstly, he declared, he would talk about the issue of the current J2s in National Junior College’s Music Programme, proffering his encouragement and his sagacious advice.

“Today, I would like to bring our attention to some music students in NJC. Yes, I am talking about the second batch of J2s who would be starting a new leg on their journey in their musical lives. Firstly, I would like to open the issue by congratulating them on having made it this far, and to say that the citizens of Metru Nui, as well as those of the Music Room and Piano Room, are solidly behind you in your quest to finish your A-Levels. May you prosper far in this musical journey, and may your musical labours come to fruition with laudable results.

As we progress, we leave behind one whole eventful year. Let us now face the next year's challenges head-on refreshed after the passing of 2008.

Now, I would like to humbly offer my advice, whether you take it or not. Firstly, in my vast experience as the Turaga of Metru Nui, I would like to know your ethnic music well. Yes indeed, this sometimes unpleasant leg of the Music Syllabus can prove to be instrumental in helping you score your As for Music, given that it occupies 40% of your entire written paper. I would like to suggest that you should know the history of the ensembles, as well as the current affairs well, as well as the make of the instrument. These, while cumbersome, are actually free marks worth scoring for if you actually know the answer. Therefore, memorise this knowledge so that you can use it to your benefit. In addition, I would like to advise you to familiarize yourself with the style of each denomination per tradition. For example, if you hear a special twang or vibrating sound in the drums in an assuredly Indian Music extract, it is usually 99.99999% a piece from the Hindustani tradition. Knowing little things like this can help you prevent a loss of 20 marks if you get the tradition wrong, as tradition will influence your various answers. Another example would be like if there is a short monodic bar before the orchestra comes in during a decidedly Gamelan piece, odds are that it would be a Javanese piece. Knowing these idiosyncrasies could save your life (and your paper).

Secondly, for the History section, memorize the notes and examples that you get in class. You don’t have to quote the precise bar numbers for non-coursework pieces, but specifying in which movement, as well as the exact nature of the trait of the example saves your example from being an ignominious ambiguity. Try to exploit your coursework as best as you can, although you will have to quote precise bar numbers. Doing so can limit how much examples you can use in a shortage of time. Know the historical background of each piece and composer well.

For practical and lunchtime concerts (you might have to do a personalized recital just like your seniors), practice and practice! While practice does not always make perfect, it will help establish familiarity with the piece. Memorize all your pieces (you would probably be asked to anyway). It gives a more professional look and helps the music to flow. While not having the score may not necessarily help you to be more musical, it is the fact that you have to be so familiarized in order to do so, your brain and eyes would be freed from having to look at the score while you play, allowing you to add any more musical expression. A lot of practice does help you memorize naturally. However, there will always be a chance of lapse as your fingers are sequentially programmed; if you forget by accident one note, you could possibly forget the entire phrase. As such, you should just jump to the next pre-assigned ‘checkpoint’ of the the piece where you can continue on, all improvise to stall while you try to remember where to go next. If you have practiced a lot, this should be quite easy for you to recall. Don’t worry, the audience is unlikely to know, and even if they know the piece, they would likely to be forgiving as they would be scared of such a lapse themselves. The best thing would be NOT to show that you have lapsed, or it could be quite disastrous in appearance. Easier said than done? Possibly, but this could just tide you over.

Lastly, Treasure your unity, Do your Duty, and Fulfil your Destiny. Lunctus Delinquo Fatum. Well, there’s it. Have a Happy New Year, J2s, and remember, all of Metru Nui is solidly behind you people.”

Wise words of wisdom indeed. And now, for the situation on Xia…’

‘…Later on, the Turaga personally encouraged the Integrated Programme Students. Turaga Vakama personally reiterated Turaga Dume’s statements of phrase, calling the IP students “young talents and geniuses”. He urged them to continue their studies and not to give up, calling on them to nurture their latent potential, “accepting it as an heirloom and allowing it to bear fruit”. He also said that” the final metamorphosis is yet to begin”, and that these talents, “young or old, will see the programme to a new dawn”, just as before. He also emphasised the need for students that we “ought to have our own music, if possible, without sauerkraut”.

Furthermore, he would like to extend his welcome to future IP/JC student studying in the Music Programme, claiming that young talents will always be welcome.

And with that, this correspondent wishes the Music Programme a Happy New Year. And now, I shall be going on to venerate our new Great Spirit.’

Upcoming concert on 6th or 7th January next week (see below). Note the eclectism in Vakama’s quotes.